The timing of Mexico was perfect. Only days before the winter solstice (which is the real new years’ eve if you ask me). Allowing everyone just enough time to reflect on lessons learned and to get ready to kick some serious ass in the new year. You really helped me get my priorities straight.
-Playboy Summit Attendee
Last week I spent 90 hours in Playa del Carmen, Mexico for the Playboy Summit that was arranged by Christian McQueen.
The days consisted of seminars combined with meeting girls on the streets and at the beach, while the nights were an exercise in approaching as many girls and having as much fun as possible–it was a motley crew of men from all backgrounds, personalities, preferences, and temperaments.
Once again, I was genuinely impressed with the quality of people who I’ve met since making connections online, starting this site, and meeting/coaching in real life.
If you had told me 5 years ago that I would be doing this, I would have never believed it.
But its happening, I’m living it, making things happen, and the best compliment in the world is when I hear guys say–“you are exactly the person you come across as in your writing”–which I lived up to the maximum in Playa.
I’ll describe just a few of the most memorable scenes here below and attempt to capture the spirit that the Playboy Summit brought to Playa del Carmen.
Night 1, The Arrival Blackout
I landed at 10pm in Cancun on Thursday and the bus dropped me off just after 11 in Playa.
After some tacos I met up with McQueen and Dave Perotta from PostGradCasanova.com (awesome dude who knows his shit), they led me to the apartment where I cleaned up and then reconvened with them and the Summit guys at a small club on the main strip where there was a table and bottles of vodka waiting.
We rolled around approaching girls and I realized right away that Playa del Carmen was going to be home to some of the most harsh rejections you could ever imagine.
I don’t mind being rejected at all, because most of the time girls will at least give you the courtesy of a response and a readable attitude.
Not the case in Playa.
There were times I would approach, say Hi, and the girls would barely even look or say anything–just a back turn and completely ignoring. This happened throughout the trip.
One night, I went up and said hola to a girl dancing and she had the nerve to wag her finger in my face like I was a dog begging for scraps. Not surprising since the place got completely animalistic during the late hours.
It was easy to get used to, and the cold rejections weren’t the rule, many approaches went well with a simple “hola, habla ingles?” and continuing from there.
Rivers of vodka kept being poured in my mouth that night, too many shots were had, and by the end I was so cross-eyed and out of it that while stumbling down the street I said “Hey, lets go hit on those chicks!” while pointing at a group of dudes coming towards us.
One of the attendees kindly assisted me back to his hotel and I passed out in his extra room.
Nice entrance Goldmund.
Day 2, Grandma Attacks
After a couple hours of sleep, I returned to the condo, had breakfast at a fantastic local place, La Perla Pixan Cuisine, which is a great spot to have any meal of the day and then chat with girls who are milling about at the outside tables (which was done more than a few times).
I swam in the ocean for a while before my portion of the seminar began–which detailed my journey as an introvert, included how to overcome the drawbacks that arise, and how to utilize the unique strengths introverts carry with them–with the most actionable steps being how to take the inward energy and direct outside on to the world.
We hit the clubs again, did countless approaches, guys started finding girlfriends for the night, and the shots came at me. I was spinning again by 430am, not quite blackout phase, but fucked up enough so that I somehow found myself swaying next to a lady in her 40s who put her arms around me and said in my ear, “have you ever been with an older woman before?”
I started laughing at her, asked how old she was, and she told me that she had a husband and grandkids. I told her that I wasn’t going to fuck her and she said that was ok because she just wanted to suck my dick.
Some of the guys were looking over and laughing so I went over to them and said “I’m not gonna do it, but I might do it, should I do it?” and all I remember was the laughter in response.
I decided that it wasn’t going to be worth it and went outside the club for a cigarette and was about to leave when grandma came running up to me and grabbed me by the arm–saying how she really wanted to give me a blowjob.
I stumbled away in laughter and disbelief as grandma held on to me on the way back to the condo.
The entire walk back she was telling me how much I was going to enjoy the blowjob and I was wondering just how the fuck this was going to pan out.
We got back to the spot, she pulled my pants down, told me to get a condom because her husband would kill her if she got caught, and she tried to put the condom on my flaccid dick.
No matter what, or how much she tried, I wasn’t getting hard for grandma. It was a goddamn relief and I laid there laughing in bed while she cursed in her Native language (I think it was czech).
I heard some of the other guys come home and they came into the room and started talking to grandma while I made my exit to the kitchen. I overheard her say that ‘she could fuck them all if she wanted’ and there were storms of laughter coming from the room.
I felt dirty and wanted to wash off whatever old spit grandma had left on me and decided it would be fun to go skinnydip in the pool. I stripped naked, went outside and cannonballed balls first into the pool while still laughing about the incident.
I went back and forth between the condo and skinnydipping a few times, laughed with the guys some more, and then thought it would be a great idea to go have a cigarette and enjoy the morning sun on the beach.
My clothes got put back on, I walked a block to the shore, and contemplated life while the sun rose over the ocean.
I thought about how if there was a God and when I died he asked me why I did the shit that I did when I was alive, I would tell him
“Ya know what God, I grew up reading your book every single day, and I absolutely loved the stories of violence, adventure, sex, and war. I wanted to make my own stories just as exciting, and thats why I did half the shit I ended up doing during my life.
For the stories.”
When I got back to the condo, the door was locked and I hadn’t brought a key with me. The guys were passed out cold and didn’t hear my banging, so I laid down on the concrete in front of the pool, put my hat over my face, and went to sleep.
A short time later I felt my feet being shook and someone yelling in Spanish. It was the condo security telling me I couldn’t sleep on the ground. He made me leave the complex, and after banging on the main entrance and yelling at him, I pretended to leave, then snuck back in, slipped up the stairs, and went back to sleep under the staircase.
An hour later, I was up and this time the guys let me in.
Grandma was in my bed sucking on a half empty bottle of vodka and I took her out of the room, showed her to the main gate, and sent her on her way.
Day 3, 6 Naked 19 Year Olds in a Hotel
The laughs the next day about the grandma incident were doubled when the Airbnb host of the condo messaged McQueen with the following:
That afternoon we hit the beaches and had a blast approaching girls. Two of the guys pulled girls right from their beach towels and up to their hotel within 20 minutes, most of us got numbers from beautiful women, and I had some fun with Camera Game.
It was much easier to approach girls on the beach than anywhere else and was a genuine good time.
That night, after the seminar, I promised myself that I was going to stay away from shots, be very picky, and do what I could to get rid of any grandma residue that was sticking to my aura.
At one club, most of the guys found matches to take away with them, and McQueen had bottles at a table. Girls were dancing all around our table, making out with all of us, and thirsty dudes were coming up to them with roses in their hands as gifts.
It was hilarious when the girls took the roses and just tossed them all in a big pile on our table, turned their backs on the guys who brought them and continued to dance and kiss us.
I ended up plucking the heads off of all the roses and sliding around the club putting the red petals on the tops of girls heads and in their cleavage.
4am rolled around and I thought for sure the girls who were dancing and kissing us were going to come back to our spot for an afterparty, but they chose to stay behind and take care of one of their very drunk friends.
We took off and ended up at Blue Parrot.
Blue Parrot was my favorite place to hang out because the atmosphere was like a big playground. There were a few different lounge areas where it wasn’t too loud, a dancefloor, a pool you could jump in, multiple bars, and my favorite–a deck in the back that overlooked the ocean. I told the guys we were with that if they met a girl they liked, they should invite them back there alone to look at the ocean and have a conversation. I did this multiple times at the venue, kissed a bunch of girls, and each time I took a one back there it was like a little mini-date.
Right when we arrived I saw a group of four very cute girls who looked like they were having a great time. They were ordering drinks at the bar, so I walked up, said “Hola!” and I went up to the sexiest one and asked how she was doing.
We chatted for a few minutes and then her friends all came to drag her away to the dance floor. She wanted me to come but I told her that the music was terrible and I can’t dance when there is terrible music, I’d rather have a conversation. She looked sad but gave me a little kiss goodbye before going to dance around like a little Mexican monkey.
Me and McQueen cruised the streets and bounced around some more clubs, and I watched with mostly sober eyes as the crowd descended into animalistic aggression. It was really something else to observe and the places we went had the music cranked so loud and were so full of drunk dudes stumbling into girls that it was near impossible to approach.
I ended up splitting up with another guy for a while and sat down on an outside couch next to two sexy girls who were at a table with a hookah. As we sat and invited ourselves to smoke their hookah, all of a sudden a dirty sock came sailing through the air and landed on my lap. And then another. I looked up and saw a naked guy and girl 3 stories up on a balcony laughing at us–I yelled “hey fuck you asshole!” and they went back inside.
**The next day it was revealed that the sock thrower was none other than one of the attendees who had pulled a girl back with him and was enjoying some post coital fun by tossing socks at us from above**
We found McQueen again, and on our way to another club, two things came running up to me, started grabbing my crotch, and told me that I was sexy and they wanted to fuck.
I told them “This isn’t right, I’m the aggressive one, now get the fuck off me” and as I stared them down, I noticed that they weren’t females at all, but men all dolled up and looking to trick some poor drunk fucker into sex–which is way worse than a grandma.
Before going in to the last club, I decided to split off on my own to see what would happen.
It was around 630am when I went down to the beach alone, took off all my clothes, and stepped into the ocean.
There were many rocks on the sea floor so I dove in and started to swim out. A large set of waves came in and pushed me out right into a little coral reef.
My legs and feet started to get cut up on the coral and I spewed out a string of curses that didn’t stop until I was able to find sand again and limp back to shore.
On the way out I tripped over another piece of coral, put my hand down to catch myself, and landed on something extremely pointy and filled with spikes. I pulled my hand out to find a fucking sea urchin stuck in my skin.
I removed it and a number of the spikes were embedded deep in my thumb and hand and cursed some more at my luck.
I sat in the water while picking out the spikes and started bleeding all over the place. I figured the water was too shallow to attract sharks and just looked up into the sky while wondering how I got so dumb.
While staring at Orion I heard some voices coming down the beach and smelled the sweet scent of marijuana in the breeze.
The voices were female, which perked me up right away, and I came out of the water towards them. It was still dark and on my way over I said “Don’t be scared girls! Hola!” and walked up to them bleeding and naked.
Before I recognized anyone, I heard “Iiiieeee!” and one came running up to me very excited. It was the sexy girl I had approached at Blue Parrot a couple of hours prior.
She started laughing very hard and asked what I was doing without any clothes on. I told her that I had been attacked by sea urchins in the water and showed her my bloody hands.
We walked over to my clothes and she helped put on my underwear and shirt while chatting about what a coincidence it was that we had ran in to eachother again.
I told her “You know, this is like one of those stupid movies where the boy meets the girl, they get separated, and then meet again under strange circumstances.”
“This is a definitely a movie, this isn’t real life. You see those stars up there, they aren’t stars, they are movie cameras and everyone is watching us.”
I had her laughing so hard at this point that it was easy to look at her, take her by the back of the neck, and pull her in for a make-out.
The sun was coming up at this point, and we walked along the beach while chatting and laughing every time I brought up that we weren’t really in real life, but starring in a comedy movie.
I asked where she was staying and she said it was a hotel that was only a couple of blocks away. I said I wanted to see this hotel and she told me ok, but she was sharing the room with her friends. They were college students from Mexico City who had come to Playa to party for a few days.
“Thats fine, I don’t mind sharing a room with girls”
And she led me to the hotel.
I entered wearing nothing but my underwear and open shirt and the concierge stopped me before going upstairs and made me pay 800 pesos.
We went up to the room, there were only two beds and they each had two naked girls in them. We went out to her little balcony to smoke and I said that we should go in the shower to wash off the sand before going to bed.
In the shower she gave me a blowjob before I put on a condom and started fucking her against the wall.
Shower sex isn’t my favorite thing to do and I wasn’t able to come.
We got out of the shower and slipped into bed naked with two of her naked friends.
A few minutes later I started fucking her again slowly, she started getting into it, the bed started shaking, and her friends started yelling at us to stop.
When I woke up to their alarm at 10am I was greeted to one of the most beautiful sights in my life.
2 beds in the hotel room, sunlight filtering in through the window, and 6 beautiful naked 19 year old Mexican girls beginning to arise from their slumber.
Their room was a complete disaster and it took me a long time to find all of my clothes. I stumbled around naked with my cock swinging around and they giggled every time I made fun of their sloppy mess.
I finished up a cigarette on the balcony, and when I came back in, the girl I had been with was in the shower with one of her friends.
I took off my clothes again, jumped in with them, and tried to turn it sexual, but they wouldn’t stop laughing.
We got out and I bid them farewell.
**I’m writing this one week later and still have several tips of the thorns from the sea urchin in my thumb**
Day 4, A Genuine Connection and Multiple Orgasms
I returned groggy to the condo and wandered around the streets of Playa with one of the guys bonding over shared stories and chatter about life.
We came back for the final seminar session and went out to a big party at Blue Parrot.
One of the most famous DJs in the Yucatan was playing that night and the place reminded me of the raves I used to go to as a teenager.
Many people were rolling on some sort of chemical, most of the girls had come to dance all night long, and I was thinking that the night was going to be a bust.
We were milling about wondering whether to stick around or go to another place when I decided to go for a lap to see what happened.
I got about 20 feet away when I caught eyes with a girl who was exactly my type.
Her features immediately told me she was from Guadalajara, which is home to some of the most genuinely beautiful women in the world.
She wasn’t wearing a tacky little outfit like most of the club rats, but she was dressed very well with a long flowing blouse that also caught my attention.
When I stepped up to say Hola, I could tell right away that she was an artist–the curious, searching eyes always give it away–and I asked if she came to dance.
She said yes, and I told her that it seemed like thats what everyone was there to do, and I felt out of place because I would rather talk my face off than go dance to silly music.
As we were chatting, she suddenly grabbed my arm and said into my ear, “you have to save my friend from that guy, he is being weird” and I looked over to see her cute girlfriend being leered at by a skinny guy who was obviously on some cheap drugs.
I told her this would be fun and approached her friend with an excited “Hola!” like we were old pals.
I waved her over and started pointing at my watch and speaking gibberish while boxing out the drugged out dope, who now looked like a wet puppy.
We kept talking until one of the guys I was with came over and introduced himself.
I told her I felt like a hero and had done my good deed for the day, so good things were bound to happen.
Our conversation continued and the amount of similarities we had was uncanny.
She was a creative artist who was into all of the things that make life interesting–nature, art, and sex–so our connection formed strong and very quickly.
When she asked what I was doing in Playa, I told her the truth, “we came down for a Summit that I’m speaking and coaching at. Sure its about meeting girls, but its also about opening yourself up to life and getting the most out of it, girls happen to be a big part of that” and she understood.
At first she refused to come into the back area near the beach with me when I asked her to, I actually enjoyed the fact that she resisted, but after her friend left to go home, I just took her by the hand and told her to follow me.
We went into the back area and I told her that I wasn’t going to ask her permission for anything anymore, I was just going to take her places, and she said that was the way she liked it.
Her feminine energy was 10x more than any girl I had encountered in a long time.
After our chatter died down, I looked at her and she said “what?” and I told her I wanted to kiss her, and moved in.
When I told her “we can do better than that” she giggled and said “I know”.
A few minutes later she looked at me and said that greatest words a man can ever hear for the first time “You want to go?”
I played it cool on the outside by replying with a calm “alright” but on the inside I was leaping for joy.
On the way out she asked where I was staying and I told her I would really like to see an authentic Playa apartment. She hesitated for a moment then told me that she had a cat and sometimes he peed in her place.
I told her I thought she knew me better than that, “do you really think I’m the kind of person who cares about cat piss?” and she laughed.
We got back to her place and it was quite nice, her artwork was all over, and she explained that there were a lot of broken things–the toilet was broken, there was no air conditioning, no hot water, and the refrigerator didn’t work. When she said she needed a man to fix things it made me want her even more.
While sitting on her bed, she took out a bag of weed and a little pipe and after we smoked, I started caressing her and our clothes came off.
I hadn’t had an orgasm in over a week and my balls were extra sensitive–after we fucked for the first time, I told her again “we can do better than that” and she said “I know”.
I was sweating like mad in the steamy apartment with no AC and we got in the cold shower together and started having sex again.
It got much more intense and by the time we got back to her bed, we were in full heat.
When I pulled out to come this time, the orgasm was slow, long lasting, and pulsing. She kept rubbing me for about a minute until I came again, much harder the second time, and felt a wave of intense energy rush through my body.
My breathing changed and it was the same heavy exhalations that I had experienced during my ayahuasca ceremonies.
I was on another level at this point, and kept going in between going down on her and making her come, fingering her and making her come, and fucking her to make her come.
Every time I came, the ayahuasca breaths returned, and she mentioned how sexy the sounded, “like animal”.
This lasted throughout the next few hours and started up again even after we had fallen asleep for a little while.
The amount of orgasms that were had in that little room in Playa del Carmen is up to the gods to count.
We parted at 8am and said that it was going to be up to the Universe to determine if we would see each other again.
Since then, we have been texting and trying to arrange plans for her to come visit in New York. She found my blog somehow and said that she appreciated the honesty–which is the best response I could ask for.
**Hola A, I know you are reading this**
When I got back to the condo around 9, I looked like a zombie. Out of the 90 hours spent in Playa I hadn’t slept in my bed once and had averaged 2 hours of sleep a day.
It was an incredible time with a great group of men who came to live life in overdrive for a little while.
I was truly impressed with the group dynamic and energy that everyone brought to the Summit and consider it one of the highlights of my writing career.
A special thanks to my good friend Christian McQueen for organizing everything and making sure things ran as smoothly as they did. (to read his recommendations about where to go out in Playa, go here.)
Until next time…