A lot of people complain about the ‘flaking epidemic’ that has been prevalent in modern culture—flakes are girls who you exchange numbers with, arrange dates, and then they cancel without explanation. This doesn’t surprise me at all and you shouldn’t get mad at chicks that do end up flaking.
Because it’s your goddamn fault.
You are the man and you are the one who needs to show your value and be worthy of seeing again. It’s not fair, but Nature isn’t fair and you have to accept this. Use it as fuel to become the best goddamn version of yourself possible.
First off, fuck online dating, you should expect every girl to flake if you met her online because there is absolutely no reason she has to make any kind of commitment to someone she has never met in person. I can’t help you there–this advice is going to apply to meeting real girls in real life situations.
What I can do is share how I go about meeting girls, exchanging numbers with, and almost guaranteeing that the flake will not happen. I can’t remember the last time I was ignored and many times the girls will get in contact with me and arrange a meetup first. That’s not meant to brag, it’s just the way it is and I’ll try and explain how to make this happen.
In today’s world it’s easy to come across lots and lots of dating advice, it can become overwhelming. Even in this part of the internet where men are aware of proper ‘game’ and the true nature of women, the same advice seems to be regurgitated over and over. Guys will end up doing and saying similar things and then complain about the quality of girls they are meeting or whining about how much they get flaked on.
So here is what you need to do to find higher quality girls who will not flake on you—emphasis on high quality—this will not work on dumb sluts so don’t waste your time with them.
The key with this is getting out of your own head in order to get into hers.
Instead of acting like a clown, putting on a show, or entertaining a girl for just enough time to distract her from her phone, you need to set yourself apart. Stop trying to force stimulation into her head.
Instead get information out of her head.
You do this by asking questions that require her to form her own opinion, explore her fantasies, recall a fantastic experience, describe an emotional event, and paint pictures with her mind—anything that engages with her on a deep level and makes her really think and feel. And that’s why this doesn’t work on dumb sluts who have a limited capacity to think and have twisted ideas on what proper feelings and emotions are.
By far, my favorite ‘opening’ line is to ask “How are you tonight?” It immediately engages with the girl and puts the emphasis on her thoughts. Plus, you can tell from her response and body language if she is going to be receptive right away or is just looking for some clown to entertain her until her Tinder date shows up.
After the conversation begins, you can ask her how she makes her money or what she is studying in school. Then ask her what she really wants to do in life, if she could quit her dayjob and retire doing something she loved what would it be? Hopefully you have some interesting hobbies that you can share with her, and even better if you make a living doing what you love. Ask her things that get her mind moving: what part of the world would she want to live in and do (whatever she said she loved)? In order to get the amount of money required to start her new business she would have to rob a bank—has she ever stolen anything before? What? How? Did she get caught? How did she feel after and when was the last time she stole something?
Keep the conversation going with questions like this, don’t share too much information with her, and when you do, be careful that you keep it interesting and unique. Before you ask what others want, figure out what your own desires are, what you would like to get out of life, and what kinds of things inspire you. Have those answers ready and prove that you are are a reflective person who has goals and ambitions.
Those kinds of questions are potent and they bring the best out of people because they go deep down to the core of their personality and the person answering ends up finding out more about themselves and becoming more self-aware. The revelations that come from self-knowledge produce deep feelings of joy and gratefulness that form connections. Why do you think a good psychologist gets paid so well?
People crave and desire to understand themselves and don’t know the right questions to ask. Plus it’s just not the same if you ask yourself the same question rather than another person who is genuinely interested in the answer. If you form the right questions and allow the answers to bubble to the surface, the magic of constructive conversation appears.
If you do this and she is forced to retrieve memories, knowledge, and life experience from her own depths, she will remember you as someone who made an impact on her. When someone has to recall, examine, and ‘pull out’ memories from themselves, it requires work on their part. They have to actively use their mind to engage with you and this is what makes them remember the experience. Connections are cemented this way and you will stand out amongst the crowd who uses lines, routines, monkey strategies, and clown behavior that most guys use when interacting with women.
This does work on sluts who are extremely easy, actively go out looking dick, and react to someone who they deem attractive and acts like a jackass. I can’t stand those girls, my introspective type of game doesn’t work on them because their shallow minds don’t have the capacity to dig deep and come up with interesting answers. Dumb sluts usually end up hating me right off the bat because they think its weird that I’ll ask them about fantasies, their spirit animals, or how they think online dating has had an effect on their social abilities. Good, I want those skanks to hate me anyway because it makes it that much easier to screen them out and move on to someone who can provide a more meaningful connection.
The best analogy I can give is comparing someone who acts like an entertaining clown and someone who gets into the head of another person is like comparing the difference between seeing a movie and reading a book. I have never in my life come across somebody who claimed that ‘the movie was so much better than the book’ because movies just don’t suck you in and engage you like a good book does. They don’t require you to form scenes in your mind and really relate to the characters and learn from their experiences. Nothing compares to a good book, it becomes a lifelong memory.
So work at becoming a great book and stand out from a world of shitty movies.
One of the easiest ways to practice doing this and putting all of you focus on the other person while simultaneously getting them to open up and prove yourself as an interesting person with goals is to practice Camera Game.
The amount of success I have had through this has been astounding and its leading to bigger things. I described my project to some people I met over Halloween and we are going to be working on something together that will be shown in a live gallery. A novel way to meet girls has turned into a profitable and productive hobby that has endless potential.
Pick up a copy of Camera Game here and practice getting out of your head.